Writings of an Angry Asian Batman

Here’s the link. Enjoy

http://angryweb.wordpress.com/2008/05/09/holy-hi-res-stills-galore-batman/

Series 1 of Mattel’s Movie Masters Action Figures for “The Dark Knight” were released today at toy stores across the country. These intricately detailed figures include Batman, The Joker, and a Gotham City Thug. While Batman comes with a mask, and Joker with a Joker playing card, the Gotham City Thug has 5 different masks to choose from. I chose “Grumpy” primarily because it’s the one Joker wears in the Prologue. In addition to these 3, there is a highly rare Batman chase figure that includes masked/unmasked interchangeable heads, the latter bearing a striking resemblance to Christian Bale.

Toys “R” Us is selling these figures for $9.99, but chances are they’ll have a short supply, as many stores had them stocked up as early as May 1st. Avoid Target if you’re looking for immediate gratification, as I hear they will not receive them until the following week. As for Wal-Mart, although they charge $11.47 for each figure, it’s definitely your best bet. Behold my marvelous collection…

Here it is in glorious hi-res awesomeness…

Be sure to check this address 4 days from now: http://www.whysoserious.com/itsallpartoftheplan

- The Angry Asian Batman

If you know where that title comes from, I applaud you

For a while now, I’ve been thinking ahead into the future and about how far I’d intend to take my writing. After possibly entering film school and acquiring enough experience, I’ve imagined myself going as far as renting an entire office building and starting up my own production company. We’d all be amateurs, growing together in the business, trying to break into the what seems to be impervious circle of Hollywood.

On a smaller scale, I’ve considered trying out the Matt Damon-Ben Affleck approach. That is, collaborating with a writing partner(s), and one day hoping to break through with that Good Will Hunting grade-A quality Oscar-winning screenplay. As I mentioned before, this was just an idea I’d considered, but never really implemented mainly because I’ve been working on a screenplay of my own, with plans to write a third one after that. Well, today, I figured what the heck. I can walk and chew gum at the same time. So I decided to try my hand at craigslist, which I’ve never been all too familiar with. I posted an ad titled “Screenwriting partner wanted”. Later in the night, I received a few e-mails about writers who might be interested in the collaboration. I definitely look forward to seeing how it all goes and I’ll be sure to keep you updated on this development.

- The Angry Asian Batman

A month ago, WB executives had the pleasure of screening the 1st cut of The Dark Knight, walking out of the theater very pleased. However, news had spread about the removal of a particular delicate scene where the Joker, played by the late Heath Ledger, climbs inside a bodybag and zips himself up. An inside source from MovieHole.net has now confirmed that none of Ledger’s scenes will be cut:

“I know for a fact that that scene is in the film. I also know that WB has made no such mandate and that Chris [Nolan] is honest when saying that he will not change what was intended with The Joker.”

I say that’s awesome news. Ledger poured his heart out into playing this role and Nolan should definitely honor his performance the way it was intended. July 18 can’t come too soon!

- The Angry Asian Batman

I’ve been writing screenplays for almost 2 years now. First off, let me say that of several million people out there, I’m a very unlikely candidate to be considered as a screenwriter. I have a Bachelor’s degree in civil engineering at UCLA and I’m currently pursuing my Master’s degree at USC (not to mention, I’m also a walking contradiction). Although I was an Honors English student during my last 3 years of high school, I’ve received no more than 2 A’s on timed writes and have always averaged out with B’s at the end of the school term. And…I also didn’t pass the AP English exam

Regardless of that and as trite as this sounds, I still believe that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to. But if not anything, you can still make it rather far in this world. Do you really want to know how I first typed in that formulaic slugline, “INT./EXT. LOCATION - DAY/NIGHT”?

I watched X-Men: The Last Stand, written by Simon Kinberg (Mr. and Mrs. Smith). How “un-epic”, huh? Despite the skyrocketing numbers it reeled in at the box office, the film was very poorly written. Desiccated dialogue. Zero character development. And far too much storyline crammed into a meager 1 1/2 hour timespan. Therefore, what did I do? After perusing through several how-to books on screenwriting, teaching myself enough about the movie business, and scanning through the entire wiki-history of the X-Men, I opened up MS Word and began the long, painstaking writing process. After four drafts, I ended up with a 120-page follow-up screenplay simply titled “X-Men 4″, attempting to repair all the atrocities that director, Bret Ratner, and Kinberg had delivered upon the “X-Men” franchise. With hopes that Fox would even consider in the slightest amount any unsolicited material, I mailed copies of my screenplay to writers/producers Zak Penn, Lauren Shuler-Donner, and Ralph Winter. As expected, I received kind, and even respectable, rejection letters from each and every one of them, as they had appreciated my persistent efforts and earnest enthusiasm for the franchise. So I moved on…

And took an advanced class in screenwriting at UCLA with Professor Hal Ackerman. Although I had already read about a majority of the concepts and writing formulas, the course reinforced my knowledge of them and grounded me into establishing a solid direction as to the level and depth that I wanted my writing to attain. I also gathered one-on-one advice from my TA, who further helped me to improve upon my weaknesses. This is was where my 2nd screenplay (as some of you have heard me ramble on about), “Resurrection”, all began. At the end of the winter quarter, we were required to write the first 15 pages of a full movie screenplay for our final. I came up with a detective mystery-thriller titled “Resurrection”. For once, with a breath of fresh air, the male lead was a smart, witty, bad-ass Asian American whose valued status was clearly defined. Meet Chang - a revered, highly-reputable elite Inspector of the Chicago Police Department, best known for solving cases once deemed unsolvable. He has a mind like an encyclopedia and a cast-iron will. Only this time, he has embarked on an investigation that will challenge these once untainted qualities, sending him spiraling into a void of self-doubt and utter paranoia. I finished the first draft of “Resurrection” earlier this year and I’m currently halfway through a 2nd draft. I’m expecting it to be fully polished by the 3rd draft and finally ready to submit to an agent to market out to the mainstream - something I definitely look forward to.

My third screenplay, also in the works, is a coming-of-age drama that touches on brotherhood and the grey areas that exist between good and evil. I have the entire story laid out with hopes of having the first draft complete by the end of this coming summer.

Well, that’s my story and I’ll be glad to keep you updated on any further developments during my “trek to the fiery caverns of Mt. Hollywood.”

- The Angry Asian Batman

…and yes, we should. The Asian man makes up 85% of the American population…okay, maybe I’m exaggerating a little bit, but apparently that’s what it seems like. Despite how prevalent we are, we’re the most stereotyped, disregarded, and shunned off demographic in modern culture today. As much as African Americans and Latinos are constantly mocked on your everyday late-night comedy programs, they have well overcome those obstacles and garnered a rudimentary cultural respect from the public eye. They have gained plenty of lead roles in American box-office hits, become revered centers of tabloid headlines, produced popular television programs of various genres, raced across Billboard music charts of all categories, and won numerous Oscars.

Where is the Asian man at? Computer office geek, Hiro Nakamura? Martial arts stars, Jackie Chan and Jet Li? “Anna…oh yeah, and the King’s” Chow-Yun Fat, soon to be Master Roshi in the Dragon Ball Z flick? What about Sammo Hung from Martial Law, which lasted 2 seasons? Or Ken Leung aka “porcupine-man” from X-Men: The Last Stand? Hmm, there was an Asian doctor with a minor role in Knocked Up…but I can’t seem to remember his name for some really odd reason. Of course, what about famed director, Ang Lee, who directed a homoerotic cowboy movie, a superhero movie that tanked, and an “avant-garde” thriller-drama with 15 minutes of rapacious sex between a traitor to China and his Asian mistress/undercover spy? I could definitely keep going, but let’s carry on…

There is also this pathetic “Yellow Fever” epidemic and if you’re not familiar with the term, why don’t I let Urban Dictionary best define it for you. Here you go:

Yellow fever - A term usually applied to white males who have a clear sexual preference for women of Asian descent, although it can also be used in reference to white females who prefer Asian men.

On to exhibit 1: Yellow Fever by Wong Fu Productions

First off, as funny as it may be, we as Asian men need to get this straight. Stop joking about it and stop victimizing yourself because unless we take any determined action to bring an end to it, I assure you 100%, nothing is going to change. Comedy doesn’t change anything because its very definition is listening to an idea, and accepting it for what it is, no matter how ironic.

I notice that a ton of Asian guys are in college Christian groups where they regularly interact with Asian girls, but only on a platonic level. ATTENTION: Your race is at the risk of its own extinction and you can save it. God gave you the ability to pro-create. He tore off one of your fellow man’s ribs, for God’s sake (pun intended), to give him a lifelong partner. If you are infatuated with a girl in your fellowship, I challenge you to ask her out right this second. No, don’t laugh about it (remember what I said about laughter). Do it.

On to exhibit 2: Why Asian Girls Go For White Guys

Pathetic. I certainly can agree that some Asian guys are too shy around girls, which is why you need to take a stand! Stop taking this bullsh*t and stand up for yourself. I have had crushes on a number of Asian girls who have told me they “only go for white guys”. Let me tell you something, if you ever find yourself in one of those situations, the complete truth of the matter is, THEY ARE NOT WORTH IT AND YOU DESERVE MUCH MUCH BETTER. I will say this blatantly: None of the girls in that video are worth your time. They’re deranged and I’m sure you can figure out for yourself, quite illogical. I’m not telling you to stop trying. Keep working up the courage to ask an Asian girl out because really, what’s your loss? If they reject and ignore you afterwards, you just skipped over a landmine and found out the type of person they really are. Believe me, although you may have already run into several of these destroyers of your race, there are exceptions out there. I have experience

You notice that in our society today, plenty of Asian girls are white-washed and subconsciously think of Caucasians as the dominant ethnic group. This is one reason why they willingly submit to the Caucasian man who asks her out. Now, let me say firsthand, that they’re not to blame at all. Who can you blame then? Answer: the media. The Asian man is constantly being stereotypically bullied away by movies, magazines, music…Abercrombie & Fitch. Even listen to this: Bloodhound Gang - Yellow Fever. And what did I say about comedy again?

So what do we do? Well, I notice that some Asians become offended whenever these racial prejudices are thrown against them. I used the term “offended” for a reason. When you take offense at something, you demonstrate hurt, as in you’ve been damaged, whether emotionally, physically, or what have you. Solution: DO NOT TAKE OFFENSE AT ANY OF THIS LOW-CLASS GARBAGE. “Ching Chang Chong”, “Chink”, “Kung Fu Karate Old Asian Man”, “Do my math, Asian kid!”, “You play the piano, right?” IGNORE IT. And most important of all, ACT BEYOND IT. What I mean by that is show what you’re really made of through your actions. Fight the system “by any means necessary”. Maybe we do need our own Malcolm X, but hopefully the situation never leads to that level of aggression and animosity. A very wise cliche: “Actions speak louder than words”. State your demands, pursue a passion, rise to greatness and eventually the world will finally yield.

One last word of advice not from me, but from the great philosopher known as Batman:

“It’s not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me.”

Madness??? This is China!!!…and Hong Kong…and every other Asian country out there. “Yellow fever” is dead. Let’s see to that statement in the coming future ahead.

- The Angry Asian Batman

Here’s the scene: Batman cruises down the freeway in the Tumbler, being closely pursued by Gotham Police cars and patrol helicopters. In the meantime, Rachel Dawes, having been exposed to a concentrated dose of fear toxin, is slipping away in the passenger’s seat. Batman slides out of the Tumbler’s “rocket-launching mode” and activates “stealth mode”. All of a sudden, the lights go out and the Tumbler fades into the shadows. Not only do the cops lose sight of him, but the helicopter’s glaring spotlight completely drifts away.

Video of The Chase Scene

I’m sure several million people have asked about this scene: “How did he just disappear like that? Can the cops not see him? I don’t see how that’s called stealth.”

You think so? Better think twice before questioning the genius of Chris Nolan. Here’s the answer:

• Patrol helicopters use thermal imaging on their spotlights to track down moving vehicles. If you notice in the scene for a brief second, Batman switches the Tumbler to an electric engine, thereby stopping its gas-powered heat source.

• When you stare at a bright light for several minutes, your pupils dilate. Turn off the light, and all you see in place of the light source is an amorphous, dark spot. This is because your pupils have not adjusted to the sudden loss of light as they gradually contract back to their original size. And it’s exactly what the cops were experiencing on the freeway once the Tumbler shut its lights off.

Pretty cool, huh? Hope that clears up some questions.

- The Angry Asian Batman

For those who are months behind the marketing campaign and want to get in on it, this is for you guys. Call this a how-to guide to becoming a die-hard fanboy of the long-anticipated movie, The Dark Knight.

Websites to bookmark

The Dark Knight ARG Wiki - A wiki that is always updated on the latest happenings with the viral. Check this first. The news board on the right gives you info on the latest events that have occurred.

The Superherohype Forums - Sign up for an account here. For news on the movie, go to The Dark Knight (Spoilers). For news on the viral, go to Viral Marketing.

• Popular Threads - Official Thread for Dark Knight Fanart/Manips, The Dark Knight Merchandise, Official Trailer #3 Discussion, The Dark Knight Anime Tie-In DVD (Gotham Knight), Batman’s Competition in 2008
• Battousi Lounges - threads where you can talk about anything you choose.

Batman: The Dark Knight - Movie Chronicles - This site is not as frequently updated, but if you want the latest pictures on the movie or the viral, it’s a great resource.

Batman On Film - This site is mainly for general Batman-related news and updates on the The Dark Knight. Although it roughly follows the campaign, it’s still highly popular amongst the fan community. You’ll eventually get to know Jett, the primary owner of the site.

Terms you need to know

ARG = Alternate Reality Game

TEOL = Tee-Hee + LOL

Perma-White = the ongoing debate on whether the Joker’s skin will be permanently bleached white or simply covered in make-up

INWT = In Nolan We Trust (as in Chris Nolan, director of Batman Begins)

TDK = The Dark Knight ; BB = Batman Begins ; B89 = Batman, 1989 ; Returns = Batman Returns ; Forever = Batman Forever ; B&R = Batman & Robin

The Nolan Brothers = Christopher Nolan (director, BB and TDK) and Jonah Nolan (writer, TDK)

TLH - The Long Halloween, one of the greatest Batman comic book series ever written and which Batman Begins and The Dark Knight are loosely based on.

Rickroll = When someone posts a link to a movie trailer, which turns out to be the Rick Astley music video for “Never Gonna Give You Up”. Ex. “Haha, you’ve been rickrolled!”

Viral Marketing Summary

Joker Events

• San Diego Comic-Con, Summer, 2007 - www.whysoserious.com campaign, puzzle games leading to release of teaser trailer
• October, 2007-December, 2007 - melting pumpkin animation leading to Scavenger Hunt #1
  • Scavenger Hunt #1: photographs of alphabetical letters taken across US, letters spelling out “The only sensible way to live in this world is without rules” leading to new Joker pic, next step to take photographs in Joker makeup next to monuments, submitted to www.rorysdeathkiss.com, participants receive Volume 1 of The Gotham Times, Volume 1 of The HAHAHA Times released
  • Scavenger Hunt #2: viral sites w/ map sections released, driving routes spell out “step right up” leading to new site, cakes w/ cell phones planted across US, teaser poster released, tickets available for IMAX screening of 6-minute prologue, Full Trailer #1 released
• March-April, 2008 - cell phones giving alphabetical letters out, spelling “clown travel agency“, new site found for Scavenger Hunt #3
  • Scavenger Hunt #3: bowling balls w/ Joker cards and cellphones planted across US and other countries, new site given: www.acmesecuritysystems.com/delos, input phone #, receive call from someone claiming to be “Lieutenant Gordon”, turns out to be ambush by Gotham Police Department

Harvey Dent Events

• February, 2008 - Present, 2008 - www.ibelieveinharveydent.com site launched
  • Political Campaign - Harvey “Dentmobiles” travel across US, posters and stickers distributed, pictures of Harvey Dent supporters taken, participants receive more campaign materials, Volume 2 of The Gotham Times, and voter registration Cards, Volume 2 of The HAHAHA Times released, participants then receive half-burned Harvey Dent button
  • “Rachel Dawes Supports Harvey Dent” video released
  • Harvey Dent Press Conference, Live Satellite Feed - Dent saves female hostage from corrupt cop, Frank Notaro

Gotham Police Events

• Log into www.gothampolice.com/secureinternaldocuments
  • Username: BarhyteGlenn ; Password: tevredenheid
  • Search for these documents: LC6551, IA8214299, IA6142137, IA176495U, IA8234971, IA8376121, IA8388555 (If you’re curious how they were found - http://batman.wikibruce.com/Gothampolice.com/secureinternaldocuments)
• Phone numbers to know:
  • Joseph Candoloro, family lawyer: 1 866 626 8049 ; Enter PIN #: 1149
  • Rossi, owner of Rossi’s Delicatessen: 1 866 580 3840 ; Enter PIN #: 9482
  • Frank Notaro, Gotham police officer: 1 866 608 3515 ; Enter PIN #: 32976
  • Voicemails are updated frequently.

If you read all of that, you’re mostly caught up. There are currently a total of 33 viral marketing websites and counting, but I have already gone over the more important ones. Good luck and have fun with it

Well, here we are, my new blog! In case you’re wondering, my xanga still exists, but hidden within the deepest and darkest niches of the cyber universe. To be honest, I really don’t know what this blog is going to be about, but one thing it won’t be concerned with are premature crushes who turn out to be the last people I’d ever consider dating and the first I’d want to avoid for the rest of my life. If you’ve somehow navigated your way through the Medieval labyrinth of poisonous thorns and mythical dragons, leading you to this blog, don’t worry, it’s not you

Ideas, ideas…what shall I write about. Here is a list of topics you can expect:

• The Dark Knight - anything and everything about it

• My Writings - screenplays I’m working on and my tenacious trek to cast the One Asian American-Leading Screenplay into the distant, fiery caverns of Mt. Hollywood

• Movie News - latest news, gossip about upcoming movies

• Asians in the Movie Industry - and why there is a shortage of them

• “Yellow Fever” - my rants and suggestions on what you can do to prevent the extinction of full-blooded Asian-Americans

That’s what I have so far. Let’s see how far this goes.

In the meantime, here’s an entertainment site I’m currently writing for: http://angryweb.wordpress.com/

Late…but right on time,

- Drakefinx2604